General Thoughts on Comments and Posts

Ratburger.org is a place to exchange ideas and debate issues. Since we are not all the same, our views differ. You get to disagree with others and they get to disagree with you. In that disagreement negative words are often used. Why? Because people think their ideas are better therefore your ideas are bad. Mild negative words will often be used such as strange, crazy, illogical, fallacious, etc. This is normal. Take this in stride.

The general idea is not to be unkind to others but to clearly state different views. After that, it is expected for people to defend their views. Back up views with reasons, facts, and life experiences. Listen to others as they state their reasons. Let them try to find faults with your reasons as you try to find faults with your reasons.

Just because someone does not see it your way they are not bad or lacking in knowledge. More often than not they have a different perspective and might even be right.

As much as possible try not to offend people and try not to take offense too easily. (This is for me as much as anyone.)

Enjoy the site!!!

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22 thoughts on “General Thoughts on Comments and Posts”

  1. TKC 1101:
    In short we need one rule:

    “DISAGREE BUT NEVER COMPLAIN”

    Would you elaborate with a concrete example?  I am having trouble knowing the difference. Isn’t a disagreement a form of complaint?

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  2. EThompson:

    10 Cents:
    The general idea is not to be unkind to others but to clearly state different views.

    Agree. Tell me that you don’t agree with my points de vue and why but don’t randomly make a comment telling me I’m a “little weird” because you’ve never in history heard anyone focus on topics in which I am interested.

    That is not only non-productive but is somewhat reminiscent of Marx who sought a radical new order based on collective thought.

    Good post Dime.

    There is a difference between telling someone “You are a little weird.” and “ I respect your trading acumen, but this just seems weird.”  This is why a link is important (comment #5).  Please notice the construction. What is the subject? It was not “you” it was “this”. In this case, the quote is not “this is weird” but “this seems weird”. It is unfair to change a “seem” to an “is”.  

    The reason for the exact quote is people get upset over not what was written but the interpretation of what is written. The example is Sarah Palin never said she could see Russia from her home. She actually said there is part of Alaska where Russia can be seen. Disagree with a person and put up an exact quote and how there is disagreement.

     

     

     

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  3. RB49:
    Describe the comment, not the commenter.

    This is play the ball not the player.

    Philosophical question

    RB49, what if the comment is basically about the commenter’s life? How does one comment on the comment without commenting on the commenter? Should the comment be ignored? Should those types of comments not be allowed?

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  4. EThompson:

    10 Cents:
    “ I respect your trading acumen, but this just seems weird.”

    Still not appropriate.

    Example:

    “I respect the fact your parents were missionaries but it just seems weird.”

    What does a comment like this bring to the table other than acrimony and ill will?

    Here is how I would have phrased it:

    “Interesting that your parents were missionaries as I have never known anyone who has gone on this journey. Tell us about it.”

    Please respond to how your quote was off. It was not “you are weird”, was it? That was a false quote and came from you, Liz. I expect people to own up to this type of morphing. It is okay to make the point that is how it could be interpreted but it is unfair to give the impression that it was written that way.

    After that I will respond to the rest of this comment.

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  5. EThompson:
    “This just seems weird” is hardly different than “You are weird” because it refers to personal behavior and interests. You’re grasping at straws.

    Let’s just end this now; I don’t care anymore.

    Besides, tomorrow is Monday and I have to focus on my weird obsession with the Stock Market and making Money.

    Thank you for responding.

    You have a right to see them as very similar but you do not have a right to give the impression one was written instead of another. 

    The person who made that comment appreciates your trading acumen and does not find it weird at all. The person even wanted you to write post on the stock market.

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  6. EThompson:

    10 Cents:
    “ I respect your trading acumen, but this just seems weird.”

    Still not appropriate.

    Example:

    “I respect the fact your parents were missionaries but it just seems weird.”

    What does a comment like this bring to the table other than acrimony and ill will?

    Here is how I would have phrased it:

    “Interesting that your parents were missionaries as I have never known anyone who has gone on this journey. Tell us about it.”

    Liz, I have read a lot of your comments. I have seen you disagree. I don’t remember a time when you have written something like “I have never known anyone who has gone on this journey. Tell us about it.” You are usually a lot more confrontational. Have I missed a comment like this of  yours? I have seen more of comments that you tell people they need to take a similar journey as yours. 

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  7. 10 Cents:

    EThompson:

    10 Cents:
    “ I respect your trading acumen, but this just seems weird.”

    Still not appropriate.

    Example:

    “I respect the fact your parents were missionaries but it just seems weird.”

    What does a comment like this bring to the table other than acrimony and ill will?

    Here is how I would have phrased it:

    “Interesting that your parents were missionaries as I have never known anyone who has gone on this journey. Tell us about it.”

    Liz, I have read a lot of your comments. I have seen you disagree. I don’t remember a time when you have written something like “I have never known anyone who has gone on this journey. Tell us about it.” You are usually a lot more confrontational. Have I missed a comment like this of  yours? I have seen more of comments that you tell people they need to take a similar journey as yours. 

    Either redact her or stop bullying her.  I find this interplay tiring, but I won’t say whose fault it is.

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  8. 10 Cents:
    “DISAGREE BUT NEVER COMPLAIN” Would you elaborate with a concrete example? I am having trouble knowing the difference. Isn’t a disagreement a form of complaint?

    Disagree means to keep  to the conclusions presented or the facts presented- dispute those with vigor.

    Complain is to declare some behavior or sentence is offending, annoying or makes you queasy.

    Fictional concrete hypothetical- “I argue with Dime over what moderators should do or not do. I complain that Dimes methods of moderation make me laugh hysterically and it wakes my neighborhood dogs at odd hours.”

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  9. This comment sounds…  It seems to me that the comment reflects…  Put down or praise the comment, and not the person.

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  10. TKC 1101:

    10 Cents:
    “DISAGREE BUT NEVER COMPLAIN” Would you elaborate with a concrete example? I am having trouble knowing the difference. Isn’t a disagreement a form of complaint?

    Disagree means to keep  to the conclusions presented or the facts presented- dispute those with vigor.

    Complain is to declare some behavior or sentence is offending, annoying or makes you queasy.

    Fictional concrete hypothetical- “I argue with Dime over what moderators should do or not do. I complain that Dimes methods of moderation make me laugh hysterically and it wakes my neighborhood dogs at odd hours.”

    I usually see a mixture of disagree with a complaint. One can always throw in a few loaded words in the disagreement.

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  11. No clue what the original issue was — don’t care.  As a long acquaintance of two parties here, I’ll offer that ET, you display a hair trigger at times, and Dime, you can certainly carry a grudge.  I am guilty of both of these, so you’ll see no condemnation from me.  We each have our “known issues”, as the IT crowd calls these things — naturally, we each insist that our OWN issues are features, not bugs.

    I agree with some of the critical points here, and with some of the defenses raised.  It may sound strange coming from me, but I hope that all concerned (and I have no idea how many people that is, as only two were mentioned by name) will or already have taken a step back.  We got a good thing going on here.  Dime works for free here, and works a lot harder than I do at my site.  ET provides great color and perspective.  And both of them wear the wrong size T-shirt.

    I’ll check out of this thread.  PM me if you’d like, but I’m not following it here.

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  12. Haakon Dahl:
    No clue what the original issue was — don’t care.  As a long acquaintance of two parties here, I’ll offer that ET, you display a hair trigger at times, and Dime, you can certainly carry a grudge.  I am guilty of both of these, so you’ll see no condemnation from me.  We each have our “known issues”, as the IT crowd calls these things — naturally, we each insist that our OWN issues are features, not bugs.

    I agree with some of the critical points here, and with some of the defenses raised.  It may sound strange coming from me, but I hope that all concerned (and I have no idea how many people that is, as only two were mentioned by name) will or already have taken a step back.  We got a good thing going on here.  Dime works for free here, and works a lot harder than I do at my site.  ET provides great color and perspective.  And both of them wear the wrong size T-shirt.

    I’ll check out of this thread.  PM me if you’d like, but I’m not following it here.

    This is about the general way to handle things. There are two basic ways to handle things.

    1. There can be tight coverage where things can be redacted for tone and using the wrong negative words. The comments get hidden and no one knows what was said.
    2. There can be loose coverage where things unless egregious are left unredacted. There will be negative things written that will have to be put up with. People can see what has been said and can respond accordingly.
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  13. I am learning the ropes here. I think in retrospect I was wrong in answering things involving a specific incident. I thought I was being responsive but I think it derailed the discussion.

    When I write a general post I put the “Administration” category on the post. This is a policy post that has to cover many situations.

    This is post is about the general way to handle things. There are two basic ways.

    1. There can be tight coverage where things can be redacted for tone and using the wrong negative words. The comments get hidden and no one knows what was said.
    2. There can be loose coverage where things unless egregious are left unredacted. There will be negative things written that will have to be put up with. People can see what has been said and can respond accordingly.

    Both ways have their pluses and minuses.

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  14. 10 Cents:
    I am learning the ropes here. I think in retrospect I was wrong in answering things involving a specific incident. I thought I was being responsive but I think it derailed the discussion.

    When I write a general post I put the “Administration” category on the post. This is a policy post that has to cover many situations.

    This is post is about the general way to handle things. There are two basic ways.

    1. There can be tight coverage where things can be redacted for tone and using the wrong negative words. The comments get hidden and no one knows what was said.
    2. There can be loose coverage where things unless egregious are left unredacted. There will be negative things written that will have to be put up with. People can see what has been said and can respond accordingly.

    Both ways have their pluses and minuses.

    Most of us have had bad experiences at a site with tight coverage.   All of us have had bad experiences at sites with no coverage.   Loose coverage?   That seems best to me, so long as it can be maintained.

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  15. I was asked in a PM what happened to Liz’s comments? Did you delete them? No, I didn’t delete them and neither did John. Our conclusion is that she deleted them herself.

    When a person deletes a comment, one gets a not found in your notification.

    I can’t speak for John but if there should ever be an extraordinary reason to delete a comment there will be an explanation. So far test comments, duplicate comments, and obvious spam comments have been deleted without an explanation.

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  16. Member EdG asked me to delete his account because his username was causing problems with the notifications. Since there was no way to edit the username deletion and starting again was the only option.

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