Alternate Answer

Helsinki Press Conference
Reporter: What exactly did you say to President Putin about Russia hacking our election?
Pres. Trump: I told Vladimir, respectfully, that if he didn’t stop, we would do the same. A lotta people don’t know it but we’ve got some real hackers…and we’ll spend more than, what was it?..a hundred thousand dollars?!
in Facebook ads, no less.
We’ll buy a vodka company and then we’ll muscle Stolchinaya out of the market, and once we get market leverage, we’ll give it out free for votes. We can do a lotta things, believe me.

I’m going to recommend to our patriotic CIA to send their PR division CNN to large cities in Moscow,Vladivostok and other cities CNN will help us learn to pronounce properly.

JIM Acosta: Are you saying you will determine or mandate coverage and placement of CNN reporters? Are you trying to send me to Moscow?

Pres.Trump: I want them to send you, JIM. And reporters like you.
You’ve proven your valor going against me directly, daring to constantly challenge. I admire that attribute and I believe other Leaders of the world should hear more skeptical questions, challenging questions, accusatory questions, that you Jim, are unafraid to ask. We’re considering Turkey, but that would be Erdogan, or Mexico.

Reporter: How will the American people be sure these aren’t just idle threats?

Pres. Trump: I don’t want to taunt Vladimir Putin boasting about American ability to fix elections, ballot stuffing … but that’s just infantry. Our air force will paint a picture… oh will they paint a picture, of some things really baad that’s happening… and how great they are – which is normal but we all do it – these people are special. We’re going to call them Special Media Forces. It will be the sixth branch after Space Force. These trained professionals are lethal, and in a way you don’t even want to think about.

But Vladimir has assured me that he does not want CNN bases in Russia and they will never be in Russian airports….I understand, but I can only do so much.. it’s either stop interfering or start getting interfered with by professionals.
Next question.


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6 thoughts on “Alternate Answer”

  1. 10 Cents:
    Is there actually an airport without CNN?

    “CNN, ‘The PanAm of Cable News’”

    Hey, PanAm was cool in its day. CNN never was. Better to be a has-been than a never-was.

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  2. drlorentz:

    10 Cents:
    Is there actually an airport without CNN?

    “CNN, ‘The PanAm of Cable News’”

    Hey, PanAm was cool in its day. CNN never was. Better to be a has-been than a never-was.

    I thought CNN was cool. To think you could get the news anytime was amazing. Then it became a broken record that repeated things. During the First Gulf War it provided a service that gave up-to-date coverage.

  3. 10 Cents:

    drlorentz:

    10 Cents:
    Is there actually an airport without CNN?

    “CNN, ‘The PanAm of Cable News’”

    Hey, PanAm was cool in its day. CNN never was. Better to be a has-been than a never-was.

    I thought CNN was cool. To think you could get the news anytime was amazing. Then it became a broken record that repeated things. During the First Gulf War it provided a service that gave up-to-date coverage.

    Just goes to show how uncool you were back then are.

  4. drlorentz:

    10 Cents:

    drlorentz:

    10 Cents:
    Is there actually an airport without CNN?

    “CNN, ‘The PanAm of Cable News’”

    Hey, PanAm was cool in its day. CNN never was. Better to be a has-been than a never-was.

    I thought CNN was cool. To think you could get the news anytime was amazing. Then it became a broken record that repeated things. During the First Gulf War it provided a service that gave up-to-date coverage.

    Just goes to show how uncool you were back then are.

    Yeah, I don’t wear sheets either.

  5. Nice, nice:

    @ OP: “I admire that attribute and I believe other Leaders of the world should hear more skeptical questions, challenging questions, accusatory questions, that you Jim, are unafraid to ask.”

    You’ve captured his tone well 🙂

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