after some waiting….

after some waiting, the death certificates came in. I’ll be running down the funeral director’s place to pick them up. Then scan one and email it off to two American Express offices. Then open up the dreaded mail that requires them, like my government retirement, her retirement(s), tomorrow go down to the credit union and argue with them. I must be calm with them.


9 thoughts on “after some waiting….”

  1. To pain-in-the-patootie clerk – “I no longer have anything to live for.  You think about that.”  Then, you walk up the chain beginning with her supervisor.  Be loud.  Bureaucracy hates loud.  Rouse the crowd.  “Who here has not been screwed by these people?

    If there is an uttered “me,” say “your’ next.”  Lord, render my enemies ridiculous.

  2. With my wife’s and my parents, it seems like the big things (Investments) went more smoothly than the small things.  Cancelling the Washington Post subscription was the worst.  I finally said : “Look, I am paying the bills and I will no longer pay yours”

  3. I did estate settlement work for 30 years.  I met with hundreds of families who were grieving, but, because of the (good) estate laws, most were children rather than husbands or wives.

    Only when we met with husbands and wives did we encounter radical grief. Only then did I lose control and weep.  I still remember each one.  I know that when my husband of 49 years and I part, one of us will be torn apart. 

    I am so sorry for you.  I hope our prayers bring you some peace.

  4. It is truly utterly absurd what grieving people have to go through after the loss of loved ones. Some entities are more compassionate than others, but government shows just how truly evil it is when dealing with the mourners.

  5. If you have a joint checking acoount with your wife do not remove her name from it for at least a year. That allows you to cash checks sent to her by depositing them in te account. This assumes you are her heir. (I was Jan’s sole heir.)

    I was getting checks for her (a lot of them refunds from various medical providers) for nearly a year after she died. Being able to deposit them rather than have to return them and have them reissued in my name was a relief.

  6. Well I did get the certificates, I scanned one to send to AMEX, and I called the other AMEX and they changed their mind after I was insistent saying I have a bill here, tell me it is a mistake because I know I paid it off, they said the balance was zero and no need for a certificate. I sent one off through the civilian personnel office for the insurance. and I sent one off to office of personal management as well to get my unreduced annuity, I had it reduced so when I would go she would have some extra. (no need for that now) Tomorrow I go to fight with the credit union to keep the same account number. As for checking because It would be hell to change things from automatic deposits to a new number and because I have a few automatic payments from it as well as the whole of electronic bill payment from it./ They want me to change, I’ll tell them go ahead and I’ll go to another credit union because with all those changes I might as well start from scratch. Tomorrow I’ll have to get certificates off to her two retirement funds, small, but the one I was in contact with said I would get the full amount she was getting.

    It ain’t easy, boys and girls, I loose my spouse of 30 years, I loose my president and soon I’ll loose this place….


    It said the cause was Myocardial Infraction, Atherosclerotic Cardiovascular Disease, Hypertension.

    Again, while you have the chance, hug your spouse and tell them you love them.


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